Saturday, December 4, 2010

Friday Fill-In's

http://fridayfillins.blogspot.com/

Check out the above link if you want to play along.

1. The best thing about a birthday celebration is having a great excuse to eat dessert!
2. I'll never fully grasp the passage of time.
3. I went shopping recently and the most interesting thing I bought was paper towels.  How's that for an enviable life?
4. I enjoy playing the child's game of Memory with my precious students.
5. The reason is Jesus.  Above all.  Above anyone.
6. I would much rather have sun and warmth than snow and cold.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to a DQ dinner with my father-in-law and mother-in-law, tomorrow my plans include cleaning the house and pulling out Christmas decorations and Sunday, I want to visit a church in hopes of finding a permanent place to worship!
 

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Blogger Review (BookSneeze.com): What's He Really Thinking? by Paula Rinehart

I came upon this book at a very timely place within my life.  Due to simple life demands, this wasn't a quick read but well worth the time invested.  The author discussed one universal truth among women is that each of us will always somehow be relating to a man.  Her words from Chapter 1: "We are better able to love what we understand.  And loving and being loved is the main way we reflect the glory of God." were the words that motivated me to complete this book

One of the main concepts were of the importance of realizing your own worth because when you view yourself as God views you, you can have a profound influence upon the lives of others.  The author also discussed the various roles a man has as well as the varying temperaments/personalities.

The most insightful aspect I found was in becoming aware of the challenges a man faces that women do not.  I enjoyed the section on specifics to pray for regarding men  and how our expectations often influence who or what people will become within the given relationships.

Though the book does include any sort of relationships you may have with a male (brother, father, mate, etc.), this book does seem more personally applicable to the marital relationship.  This was my introduction to the works of the author, Paula Rinehart, and I look forward to reading more of her materials.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

In the Wind

Screaming at the top of my lungs
But sounds won’t come out.

Wanting desperately to be heard
Yet the words aren’t there.

Wondering why others can’t see
What I’m afraid to show.

Why aren’t there answers
To the questions left unasked?

What will it take to be seen?
To be heard?

What will remain if the mask
Is removed?

Tired of playing.
Tired of hiding.
Tired of hurting.
Tired of trying.

Surrender is welcome.
Reprieve is desired.

Screaming in the wind
Yet no one hears.

Friday, July 9, 2010

God at Work

It has been difficult for me to return to the land of blogging.  Hard to find the words that lie deep within my heart but by the grace of God, the shadows of fear are lessening and the strength that can only come from God is resurfacing. 
God's work within me is graciously continual but this past October seemed to be a dramatic turning point.  A beauty from ashes type of moment in which God's methods literally left me speechless---a mixed form of shock and awe.

I admitted myself to the hospital after a lengthy battle with "clinical depression".  The sense of despair deepened in ways I'd never imagined, largely in part due to a pharmaceutical mistake that, thankfully, was remedied within a matter of days and I returned home.  The time in the hospital was calming and and I felt God using that time to draw me closer to Him without my usual protective pretenses. 

I was allowed to take an extended leave of absence from work and the months of November and December were spent in re-evaluating, redirecting, rejuvenation, and repentance.  I clung to and cried out to Him and could almost tangibly feel the warmth of His grasp on my mind, heart, and soul. Once the toxic medication dissipated and I felt more physically rested than I had in the longest time, all seemed so clear and so hopeful.

On Christmas Eve, my dad's life ended.  He had been diagnosed with terminal cancer yet the cancer was not the cause of his death.  When I received the call regarding his death, my immediate reaction was anger and disgust.  There is no doubt in my mind that the timing of his death was purposeful---the 'perfect ending' to a sociopath's narcissistic life.  You could almost the voices of those who truly didn't know the man thinking "...poor, poor man died all alone on Christmas Eve; none of his children were even there..."  Unbelievably nauseating, as was his memorial service on New Year's Eve and his burial a few weeks later.

My dad's death struck me in such an unexpected emotional way.  I truly believed that I had already "grieved" his loss when our relationship ended almost 7 years ago.  His death not only brought an end to his earthly life but an end to any hopes that I had, unknowingly, hung onto of the relationship ever being truly reconciled.  I had allowed myself to think that if a reconciliation did occur that the relationships with my aunts, uncles, and cousins wouldn't be so terribly awkward. 

I was able to spend an afternoon with my dad a few weeks before his death.  That "visit" resulted in a certain amount of peace but was far from a reconciliation of any sort.  As I left his burial site, I knew that I was not only saying 'goodbye' to the man who was my dad but I was also saying goodbye to any hopes of a better relationship with him and his family.  An unexpected sense of loss and betrayal were deeply felt. 

Looking back, these occurrences between late October to the beginning of January seemed to be the beginning of the process of removing layers of the filth and lies in which I had allowed Satan to shroud my heart.

For the sake of length, I'll close here and pick up next time with the continuation of layers being removed that have led to a sense of clarity and purpose that I have never experienced.  I am so thankful for the words of Philippians 1: 6 (NLT):   
And I am sure that God who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on that day when Christ Jesus comes back again.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Friday Fill-ins #175

And...here we go!

1. Salsa and tortilla chips ALWAYS sound good to me.

2. Hot dogs, hamburgers, fresh made pickles, homemade ice cream and you've even got mustard.

3. By the time I get home, lately, I have been too exhausted to do anything but sit and long for an early bed time.  'Tis common for the last 3 weeks of school.

4. Checking out the fresh produce is what I look forward to most when grocery shopping.

5. And I was dreaming and then PUNCHED the heck out of our wooden headboard; 2nd time in 2 months...my husband is getting concerned about his personal safety as I sleep(!!).

6. This week I had the opportunity to snuggle with a precious newborn baby boy (12 days old)...is there anything else better?!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to hopefully sleeping the entire night through, tomorrow my plans include basic housecleaning, and preparing snacks for Mother's Day and Sunday, I want to spend some special time with my amazing mom and my sweet mother-in-law!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Realizations and repentance...


I should have been home long ago but there is something about the solitude of a school building that is emptied and quiet after an active, lively day.  I have spent the last 1 1/2 reading over blogs and Spiritual sites that bless me in more ways than I could ever express.  Some posts brought smiles to my heart and others tears to my eyes.  I hadn't realized until earlier in the week how I have allowed the current conflict with some of my in-laws to, literally, dominate my thoughts and my time.  There isn't a foreseeable end to the chaos that ensued on Easter Sunday.  I am at peace with God, my husband, and myself but am so saddened that my mother-in-law will be experiencing a 'divided-family' on Mother's Day. 
The family member that is INSISTENT that I have committed apostasy (I had to look up the word) is calling on others in the family to withdraw and confront me as she has regarding the issue of my lost soul since I have turned away from God by failing to worship at "His one true church".  That attitude alone saddens me, as do the words that have been expressed, and the actions that have been taken.
I know that God is right here with me and He is fully capable and willing to 'fight this battle' without any input from me yet I feel helpless because I am, literally out of words that I wish would come and help to possibly alleviate some of the pain that this has caused within this family.

I am also saddened by the ways in which I've allowed this conflict to consume me.  I know Satan is overjoyed that I have withdrawn from those closest to my heart because I fear the brokenness that they may see and I fear that I won't be handle the brokenness of others.  I have neglected relationships in my workplace, in my congregation, in my Bible Study Group, and in the world of blogging b/c I have allowed myself to become so emotionally drained.  I am not, by any means, depressed yet I've done what has always been a sinful, selfish, unhealthy response...remove myself from others so not to be a burden and so not to carry any additional burdens.

Seeing those words in black-n-white make me feel ill.  My God is bigger than I am allowing Him to be.  Jesus has conquered all and made me more than a conqueror and I am so ashamed that I have been living in a state of distrust, fear, and shame.  I repent of such at this very moment and pray that I will allow God to be God and that He will enable me to be who and what He has called me to be. 

Looking forward to catching up with my blogging buddies over the weekend and leaving this and all other burdens in the hands of my Father. 

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Friday Fill-ins


And...here we go!

1. I was
so happy to hear my precious nephew's voice on my answering machine.
2.
I remain amazed with my absent-mindedness that causes me to repeatedly lose focus and I left my book at work once again, even though I made post-it note reminders and an email reminder.

3. Why do some people seem to thrive on chaos?
4.
My much-loved and much-missed friend, David was in my thoughts today. His smile, hug, and loving words are missed so much!
5. One of my father's favorite sayings was
"guran-damn-tee it". As if there aren't enough curse words available, one must insert one in the middle of a commonly used word.

6. Wondering if this week will ever be over--I know that feeling!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to
spending the evening with my mom, tomorrow my plans include taking items to Goodwill, taking a return to Walmart, grocery shopping, cleaning, and mapping out the remainder of the school year and Sunday, I want to participate in the special luncheon regarding Mission Efforts at Bethel with the prayers that all will be encouraged to participate and support the local and world-wide opportunities that God has made available!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Shock is dissippating but consequences...

...of recent actions/choices are heartbreakingly heavy.  The conflict continues and I believe Satan will allow it to continue, unless, conversation, concerning the matters at hand cease.  I have said all that I know to say. As I stated in my previous post, my words from the beginning of this "conflict" were pridefully defensive rather than being led by God.

I, continue, to feel at peace, that my responses since the initial confrontation/s, have been Spirit-led, though I'm sure far from perfect.  Most, if not all,  of my offered responses have been met with resistance, hostility, and accusations stemming from words in 13+ years of conversations that have been taken out of context, turned hurtful and hateful and exaggerated to the point of becoming blatant lies. I never would have imagined all that has been said ever becoming a reality.

I know that Satan is rejoicing that a division has, indeed, occurred but I am equally confident that the Lord, in His own ways and in His own timing, will use all of this ugliness to further His goodness.  (Though, admitttedly, it would be nice to know how and when...)  Thankfully, I have come to discover that the majority of my husband's family do not agree with the arrogant, self-righteous judgments that have been made.  The fact seems to be that it involves 1 sibling of my brother and 2 of her 3 children totally backing her by her word alone.  I am comforted by the idea that not "all" have struck out against me in this way but I absolutely HATE that stress and hurt that this has caused for so many. 

I responded to the latest accusations after allowing time to "cool off", spending much time in prayer, and seeking Godly counsel from trusted friends, family, and leaderships which included  both "religions" (one of which my sister-in-law has stated to be the "ONE, TRUE, church" and the one she has chosen to condemn.)  Apparrently and thankfully, my amazement of God is never going to cease----both "leaderships" advised the exact same response in removing myself from the situation...more of less told to stop attempting to fight the battles that belong to God; be quiet, be still, stand, trust, and anticipate being further amazed bu the goodness and power of God.

I will, prayerfully, stick by the decision made to be silent, be still, and let God be God.  THANK YOU to all who have encouraged me by your "comments" and direct emails.  I don't believe that I could adequately express how much the prayers and comfort have meant to me during this difficult time.  Please continue to be in prayer for the Lord's will to be done and especially for my husband, Wayne, to find peace, comfort, wisdom, and guidance to deal with what has been truly heart-wrenching.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Still reeling from the shock…


of all that has occurred within the past week. What started out as an enjoyable "annual in-law-family get-together" at Easter has turned into something I would have NEVER imagined. There was a minor misunderstanding before this annual event that my husband and I host each year for 70+ of his family members. I was so thankful that a family member called beforehand to "clear the air" so nothing negative was hanging over the annual lunch and egg-hunt. I was under the impression that all been resolved and honestly, hadn't thought any more of the simple misunderstanding before it was brought to my attention by 3 others that another family member was still very upset. I was saddened to hear this and waited until all of the festivities were over before approaching this person and asking to speak privately (one-to-one) in hopes to put this minor issue aside. I am still in shock of how such a simple issue brought about a personal attack that I NEVER saw coming.

Those whom, even remotely, "know" me know that I am among the least confrontational group of people around. My entire life, up until very recently, has been all about keeping peace, regardless of the personal costs, to avoid anyone being hurt/saddened/angered, etc. My approaching this family member was to simply encourage her that if and when I did/said/wrote anything that offended her, that I would appreciate and welcome her coming to me before discussing whatever issue with numerous other family members. By the time this short conversation had ended, I had literally been judged and condemned to hell because I had chosen to "…leave THE Lord's church…" I was hurt by the words that were spoken and unlike me, immediately reacted. I regret and have sought forgiveness for my wounded pride leading me to say some things in anger that could have been handled in a much Godlier manner.

Since that afternoon, several emails have surfaced within the family (addressed as a large group) in which it seems that there are those who truly think that I am going to hell because I no longer attend the congregation that they believe is the "…only, one, TRUE church…"

So much has been said. I've only been able to respond to one accusation, which, unfortunately, fueled the fire to spread through rebuttal and arguments. I have declined to "speak" of the issue any further b/c of the absurdity that such a simple conversation escalated into the presumed "…lost condition of my soul…" For one to come at me with this "concern" in the midst of being confronted about a totally-unrelated issue has led me to believe that this is not/was not a true, genuine, loving, relational 'concern' since not family member had spoken of the "…deep grief that accompanies my eternal separation from God…" until I chose to approach them about a trivial matter that could have and should have been resolved by the act of common courtesy, much less the Biblical principle, to go to a brother 1st about a problem before involving others. There does not seem to be a foreseeable end to this chaos.

I am at peace, in my heart, b/c I know, without a doubt, that I am secure in my walk with God and that my motives were pure though my actions and words were not perfect. But I am heartbroken by the strife this has caused within the family--- especially my husband; he is being 100% supportive of me, yet is in the middle of this "conflict".

Please join me in prayer that this may be resolved soon with God's name being glorified above all. I know that He can use this ugly, prideful, sinful mess for His glory, but in the "waiting" for Him to do so, my husband is being torn in two, anger is escalating, and relationships are breaking down.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Friday-Fill-Ins # 169


  1. The right word will usually come when one is still and waiting to hear what God is telling you.
  2. Please lower your voice and shut the door quietly, please is said in my Pre-K classroom at least 10 times per day.
  3. Up in the clouds is where my head has been lately; thinking of tasks to come rather than the ones at hand.
  4. At my house, with blaring music and cleaning supplies is where you'll find me this weekend as I prepare for 50+ Easter Sunday guests.
  5. Ooh! What is that smell? Thank you to the PTO for bringing lasagna and sides to the teacher's lounge on Thursday. The entire building smelled scrumptious!!
  6. I think a 3-day week-end is a good idea.
  7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to doing absolutely nothing, tomorrow my plans include cleaning, cleaning, cleaning and Sunday, I want to attend worship services, complete lesson plans, and finish up the video series "NuMe" by Andy Stanley!
Praying that all have a weekend filled with blessings, including the WARMTH of sunshine. J

Saturday, March 20, 2010

FRIDAY FILL-INS # 168


Running a lil' late today...actually began the post at 6:30 a.m. & completed past midnight. HAPPY WEEKEND TO EVERYONE!!

  1. Today I will be so grateful for the expected Spring Time weather. Love sunshine-y days!!
  2. Some people ask "why me?" and I say why not me?
  3. What do you think of being rid of daylight savings time and continuing to simply have longer days of actual day-light?
  4. At my place of employment it's free Pastry Day til 1030 Friday! Not often but it has been known to happen. Who wouldn't love a fresh glazed donut waiting for you upon your arrival?!
  5. People say that what we're all seeking is our own self-interests but I choose to disagree. Most people that I am privileged to know are basically self-less and seek God above all
  6. The image I cherish most is actually being held in my Savior's arms one day.
  7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to seeing my mom and talking with my friend, Randy, tomorrow my plans include continuing to prepare/clean the house for the barrage of family members on Easter Sunday and spending time with my brother, Kevin, and my adorable niece, Elizabeth and Sunday, I want to attend
    both Bible Class and Worship Services at Bethel Bible Church…it's been way too long
    !

Monday, March 15, 2010

10 More Mondays :)

Today has been a great day! I actually got to school early and had time to set the room up with some "leprechaun tricks" (chairs turned over, items moved, mis-matched center toys, and green glitter spread throughout the room.) The students had such a good time trying to restore order to our classroom and searching for a note from the "leprechauns". The morning was filled with hugs, "I missed you's", and lots of giggles. The weather was beautiful so we went on a special walk to observe all the changes that the new season is bringing. No matter how yucky some of the days are, I know that I have the BEST job in the world and am so blessed to be employed where I am and to have the privilege of working with the best co-workers and so many wonderful families.

Stopped by Walmart after school (a usual dreaded task) but knowing that the sun would be shining when I left the store and headed home made it much easier. Requesting prayer for my mom who has injured her knee, my sister who is facing one of those "big-life-decisions", and my brother & his family as they will be out of touch while camping out for his kid's "Spring Break". So many people are in need right now…so grateful that God is far more aware and far more capable of meeting those needs. Praying that He will use me as His tool whenever and wherever needed.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Well, "Spring Break" is officially over. Ho-Hum...

Tomorrow, I return to work---to the classroom tasks, to the never-ending energies of children, and the insurmountable task of ever feeling "caught up". I so enjoyed the break and so enjoy my job but I am REALLY ready for this school year to be over. These past few months have been difficult and I feel like I'm swimming upstream. I am not tired of teaching; I love my little ones…I am just ready for a fresh start. There is still much to do to prepare these precious ones for kindergarten but the time between now and the end of school will FLY by, if the past is any indication.

Looks as if the Pre-K program will be moving to a full-day program next year and I think that will make a world of difference in my teaching attitude and in the "gist" of the daily schedules. Having 2 groups seems to be such a rush to cram everything needed in and I am simply wiped-out by the end of the day.

I was prayerfully considering returning to kindergarten but my principal encouraged me to stick with Pre-K for one more year b/c she thinks I will adore the new schedule and set-up. I should be in bed right now but my mind is going ninety to nothing with all the things coming up. I am praising God for having had this opportunity to rest and continually praying to find/make the balance between home, school, friends, etc. work better for the sake my physical, spiritual, and emotional health.

Friday, March 12, 2010

FRIDAY FILL-INS


1. I am so looking forward to spending time with my mom, sister, and nephew Kaeden. Can't imagine how much one must love their own children because my niece and nephews fill my heart in more ways than I had ever imagined!
2. I'll clean out my school closet later. Simply couldn't bring myself to even enter the school building while on the "Spring Break".
3. When you get discouraged, call out to God and seek His counsel through His Word and His people.
4. Learning to "let go" and stop trying to be all and do all is a big part of my life right now.
5. If you need anything, don't count on others to know unless you kindly speak up.
6. I am so wanting to go camping for a trip.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to completing the organization of my new home-desk area, tomorrow my plans include cleaning off the cobwebs and such from the front and back porches and Sunday, I want to re-connect with friends that I've been neglecting and go worship my Heavenly Father!

Feeling good...

Wow! This week off of work was exactly what I needed. Thank you, Lord, for providing for such a time.

I have been able to rest when needed, visit with a few precious friends, enjoy time with my mom, my sister & her family, and took the "me-time" to get re-focused and rejuvenated for WHATEVER the future may hold.

Joy and peace are returning to my soul after I was beginning to believe that may not ever be possible. God brought it to my attn. that I keep praying for ways to cope rather for complete healing; for Him to strengthen me rather than enabling me to rest in His strength. I am so prone to being a "do-er" that when "doing" wasn't working, all felt lost, and worthless. SO UNTRUE and I will not allow Satan lies to take me off track in my relationship with God for one more day!

I'm looking forward to this "fresh start" and "new beginnings". Time to deal with the past, put it in its place and move forward. Praising God for the opportunity and privilege to do so through and only because of Him.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Continuing the Journey

I want so much to believe all that God has promised yet still struggle with so much doubt and uncertainty. If someone else is expressing the things that I am inwardly experiencing, I have the "right answers", the "proper Scriptures", and will faithfully pray for them. But for reasons I can't quite comprehend, I continue to feel as if I am the exception to the rule of God's grace, forgiveness, goodness, mercy and love even though I KNOW that is not true. I know that I am not to base my decisions, etc. on 'feelings' but on the Truths from God. But it can be so difficult at times; especially when the feelings come on so strong---even in the midst of sleep.

A friend recommended that I read and truly study a book by Robert McGee titled Search for Significance. I am praying for the Spirit to guide me to the truths in this book that I so desperately need to grasp hold of. I love my God and I know He loves me but the journey continues to be filled with moments of fear and weary and I know that is not what God intends for me in my relationship with Him.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Part 2: Returning to Blogging w/ Reflections, Renewal, & Rejuvenation

A new year often seems like a fresh start; some say it as if the old has passed away & the new has begun. I love the concept but know, with certainty, that all of the occurrences in 2009 & the years past) are going to need more than a change of date to be reconciled, renewed and healed.

I am so thankful that, through Christ, each and every moment is a time of renewal and restoration. God doesn't work on an earthly time frame, but His timing is perfect. The start of a "new year" sounds full of promises & peace, but peace can only be found through Christ.

Father God,
I thank You for the gift of peace that is mine, only because of what Jesus has done. (Romans 5:1) Thank you for sending Christ at just the right time so that I may rejoice in the wonderful relationship I now have with You. (Romans 5:6, 10, 11) Lord, I praise You for the new life that came through the sacrifice and deliverance of Your Son. (Romans 6: 8, 9, 13)

Father, I thank You for the assurance that even though I grow weary at times; I have comfort & hope in the truth that whatever experiences occur are temporary & that Your Spirit will guide and sustain me. (2 Corinthians 5:2, 5) I thank You for the promises of newness, reconciliation, and restoration that are through Your love, by Christ's actions, rather than any time-table set by man. (2 Corinthians 5:17, 18, 21)

There are many circumstances in this world that break my heart. At times there are (and have been) words and actions that seem to crush my soul. Lord, I pray for the determination and discipline to not focus my mind on those things. Help me to gaze into Your compassionate eyes; to abide in Your loving arms; to fully think of the realities of heaven; & to always remember that my life is now in Christ and through Him, I am more than a conqueror. I am saved, secure, and filled with the presence of Your Spirit. (Colossians 3: 1-4, 10; Romans 8)

Father, I continue to battle with regret, bitterness, anger & hurts from the past, yet I continually feel the healing power of Your love, compassion, & mercy. Help me to rely on those precious gifts from You. Enable me to accept & allow the peace that comes from Christ to rule above all other emotions. (Colossians 3:15) Lord, help me to live each moment, prayerfully, before You with an understanding heart/mind, with an attitude of gratitude, and a mind grounded in Truth. May Your words live in my heart & may all I do and say be a true representation of Jesus & Your glory. (Colossions 3:16, 17)

Through the Blessings of Your Beloved Son, AMEN

Returning to blogging with reflections, renewal & rejuvenation

I woke up this morning thinking about all that has occurred over the past 3 years. Circumstances and situations from late 2008 and through 2009 were weighing upon my heart. Seems that so much has occurred within that time frame.
  • Marcus' untimely death in November '08
  • David's possibly avoidable death in December '08
  • Scare with Doug regarding what thankfully was not a heart attack
  • My sister and her family moving out of town
  • Moderate-injury of my shoulder that caused a lot of aggravation and inconvenience
  • The AMAZING mission trip to Jamaica
  • A successful hosting of "Easter Sunday" with a huge number of family members
  • An enjoyable 1st sleepover at my house with both nephews and my niece
  • Re-connecting with my older sister after years of non-communication
  • Re-discovering old friends via Facebook
  • An ever-increasing deepening of my own relationship with God
  • Marital struggles that seemed inevitably to end badly yet God has blessed us with a sense of renewal and re-commitment
  • My brother, Kevin, being seriously injured while on-duty as a policeman
  • The miraculous births of Chloe, Riddick, Marcus, Sam and Joshua accompanied by the sadness of Joshua's death.
  • Amazing displays of faith exhibited by the following families during times of tragedy, illness, and loss: Turner, Hager, Smithies, Hall, Morrison, Graves, and Nolley.
  • Devastating physical, emotional, and mental repercussions from pharmaceutical/medicinal mistakes that led to deepening depression, a short-term hospitalization, and an extended-leave-of-absence from work due to "SSRI Discontinuation Withdrawal Syndrome"
  • The amazing "virtual friendships" established through blogging with many wonderful people including Carol, Denise, Gail W., Laura, Leila, Liz, Paula, Sande, Sue, and Tina.
  • The opportunity for "closure" with my dad before his expected, though untimely death on Christmas Eve '09 followed by a 'surreal experience' at his memorial services on New Year's Eve.

What a journey it has been. While thinking on these things, God allowed me a supernatural awareness and led me to His Words that have truly enlivened my heart, mind, and soul...now just to get my body to follow :o).

Due to time constraints, I must close for now but looking forward to returning with the blessed insights that God showed me this morning.