Sunday, July 13, 2014

Action Plan

This moving business is harder than I ever imagined it to be even though I do not have any doubt that what is happening is best. Niece and nephew have been here for the past few days. A very low-key visit compared to their usual summer visit but my energy level and emotions are still inconsistent and my finances are low, at best. They are great kids who have grown up entirely too fast. Hard to believe that they will be high school freshman this year!! GULP!!

The issus with my car have been thouroughly irritating. Husband and I have not been angry but mainly just hurt over the past few months, but all this car stuff has been maddening. The issues that are now costing me at a most inconvenient time could have easily been prevented with proper care/maintenance. I feel extra foolish now for not taking it to repair places simply because he said that he would get to the repairs. Heaven forbid that I rocked the boat. Ugh!! The car has over 201,000 miles on it but I'd really like it to last at least one more year. Spending $1500.00 on it this summer was NOT in any sort of plan. But on the bright side, all should be well as I move and allow for a no car hassle in the midst of all of the new beginnings fixing to take place.

I will be taking niece and nephew to my sister's house tomorrow while dropping off a trunkful of items at my new place. I first need to get new tires in the early a.m. Before making that trip, we are planning on going to the Dog Rescue Ranch beforehand so that I may meet "Phoebe" and ensure that she and I will be a good match. I can't even describe the hurt in my heart at not taking my 2 fur buddies with me even though I think I am doing the right thing for each of us. Wish simply being right also meant not hurting. There are moments that I am amazed that my heart is actually still beating among all the breakage. Trusting that God truly will heal the broken-hearted. 

When I return from the quick trip, the DREADED task of going through what has been my home for many years will begin. I set up a gradual plan for me to sort through things alone. My mom will help me package the items and My friend, LDC, will be helping me move. My brother will be taking care of the larger items. If all goes somewhat according to plan, I will be set to go at the new place with at least 2 1/2 weeks before beginning the school year. Setting up both the house and a classroom will be interesting on a much-tighter-than-anticipated budget, but all WILL be okay.  I am definitely a low-maintenance kind of person so as long as the basics are set, I'll be fine. 

I have really been missing my out of state friend and remain in prayer that this friend is doing okay, is truly finding peace and happiness and knows that I'm still here if anything is needed. A strange hurt in my heart that I don't enjoy but I also don't regret even though so much may not ever make sense. 

Broken-hearted endings and bittersweet beginnings mark this current chapter of life. 
"Just keep swimming" continually plays in my mind. 
"Just keep swimming..."

No comments:

Post a Comment