Exhaustion is an understatement! What was supposed to be my final trip to T-town for "one more carload" was extended once again. UGH!! I go back to the area on the weekend of the 30th so that WILL be my final trip out to the house. I have no doubt that I have done the "right thing" but having no doubt doesn't cause the pain associated with so many endings go away.I cried throughout the entire day then for the first 1 1/2 hour of the shoulda-been 5 hour drive. I only made it 2 1/2 hours and decided to stop and spend the night at a hotel. Thinking maybe I could just live here in the pre-cleaned, breakfast served daily room ;)
As I was driving back into T-town, I thought of how few the "good memories" are in a place that I called home for close to 19 years. Surprised and saddened me. SO THANKFUL for new beginnings. I will NOT repeat the mistakes of the past. I will treasure each moment. I will be honest with myself and with others. I will not compromise what I believe. I will not base my choices on fears or shame. I will make the most of every opportunity. I will be genuine in my relationships with others.
Living like a hermit for the past 12 years has been ridiculous and I am so looking forward to being involved in LIFE again.