I'm not even sure what "normal" means anymore but I do know that I am in need of some sort of normal---whatever that may be.
I didn't simply crash and burn today so that's an improvement over the past several weekends. I didn't "accomplish" much but did get out and about socially. I still feel incredibly awkward doing so but took that step, regardless of how small it seems.
Sheryl, Mom, the boys and I went to the movies then sat outside at Sheryl's and visited for awhile. Amber invited us all over for dinner this evening. After first declining, I changed my mind and am glad that I decided to go. Amber & Rob had some more friends over and it was nice to meet them both (Lisa & Kevin).
I made it through the entire day with only 2 instances of tearing up. I am beyond ready for my emotions to level out. Sigh.
I'm now sitting at home trying to make a mental plan for tomorrow. There is SO much to do in my classroom and at home but I need to prioritize because there's no way to get it all done in just a day.
This week, I am focusing on prioritizing tasks and pacing myself. This all or nothing/crash-n-burn scenario is wearing me down physically and emotionally.
Today, I'm especially thankful for:
1. The enjoyable time at the movie theater.
2. A beautiful afternoon to sit outside and visit while watching the boys play.
3. The realization that I made it through the first month on the new job with the ability to meet all financial obligations. I may need to rethink simply walking away from all financially. Making ends meet is a bit harder than I anticipated BUT all needs have been met and the 1st month was a success.
4. An enjoyable evening with family and friends.
5. Coming home to a house FREE OF GECKOS!! I think I finally figured out how the harmless but creepy little critters were getting in the house.